For me the most interesting thing about a solitary life, and mine has been th

游客2024-12-24 13

问题 For me the most interesting thing about a solitary life, and mine has been that for the last twenty years, is that it becomes increasingly rewarding. When I can wake up and watch the sun rise over the ocean, as I do most days, and know that I have an entire day ahead, uninterrupted, in which to write a few pages, take a walk with my dog, read and listen to music, I am flooded with happiness.
I am lonely only when I am overtired, when I have worked too long without a break, when for the time being I feel empty and need filling up. And I am lonely sometimes when I come back home after a lecture trip, when I have seen a lot of people and talked a lot, and am full to the brim with experience that needs to be sorted out.
Then for a little while the house feels huge and empty, and I wonder where my self is hiding. It has to be recaptured by watering the plants and, perhaps, by looking again at each one as though it were a person.
It takes a while, as I watch the surf blowing up in fountains, but the moment comes when the world falls away, and the self emerges again from the deep unconscious, bringing back all I have recently experienced to be explored and slowly understood.

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答案只有当自己疲惫不堪、长时间不停地工作或是一时觉得空虚而需要充实时，我才会感到孤独。有时，在我旅行演讲归来，因为我已与许多人见面交谈而满脑子的想法需要理出头绪，这时孤独感也会袭上我的心头。
此刻，整个屋子就会显得空旷宽大，连我自己身藏其中何处，都不得而知。于是我只得给花木浇浇水，欣赏欣赏它们各自的姿容百态，权把它们当作活生生的人来看待，借以找回自己的自我感觉。
这种自我感觉的回归，需待之以时。当我眼望着汩汩的浇花喷水，须臾之间，顿觉现实幻然隐去，而深藏于潜意识之中的自我感觉，却携带着我近日的所见所闻悄然而至，令人细细品味。

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