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You’re sitting at a restaurant waiting for a friend. Twenty minutes after yo
You’re sitting at a restaurant waiting for a friend. Twenty minutes after yo
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2023-08-27
48
管理
问题
You’re sitting at a restaurant waiting for a friend. Twenty minutes after your designated meeting time, they arrive in a flutter with a list of excuses. Perhaps there was too much traffic or a meeting ran long. You’ve heard it a million times, yet their behavior never changes. Sound familiar?
" I think everyone has a person in their life that does this," said Herb Reich, author of the book 2051 Things That Really Piss Me Off. " Being late constantly, to me, means you are saying your time is more valuable than mine. "
Reich said while it’s easier to forgive friends and family for their lateness, we need to establish very clear boundaries for being on time when it comes to professional relationships. " Sometimes I will establish consequences in the contract," he said, " It’s always wise to let people know what you feel about their behavior. "
And while Reich said lateness is a "personality trait," psychologist Pamela Brand said the behavior is neurological(神经学的). "We call this a bio-psycho-socio pattern," Brand said.
The biological cause of lateness, she said, is when the person’s organization and planning skills are underdeveloped. Socially, she said there can be learned behaviors or cultural communities that don’t focus on time or being prompt.
"If someone wasn’t raised ever looking at a watch, and things were kind of loose growing up, just knowing this can help us understand why they function a certain way," she said.
The psychological part of the pattern is when a person pardons or rationalizes their behavior with excuses, Brand said.
So can people change their ways?
"It’s my belief that all patterns can be changed if a person is conscious and wants it to be changed," Brand said. " There’s a book called You Are Not Your Brain that I refer to often that outlines a four-step process of changing patterns in the brain. It does a wonderful job of giving a clear explanation of how patterns develop, how they are hard wired into the brain and how to shift patterns to support neurological shifting.
"This could take six months for a neurological change to stick," she said.
To lend support for someone who is trying to be more punctual, Brand said it helps to raise the stakes.
"A person is much less likely to be motivated if there are no consequences," Brand said. " If there is no threat to losing a relationship, losing a job or getting kicked out of school, things will stay the same. So if being late bothers you, you have to really make the contract clear. "
Reich agrees. "Once, I was waiting for someone in my professional life, and after 15 minutes, I left," he said. " I explained why I did this, and that changed their behavior. My time is just as valuable as theirs and I don’t want to sit around. They weren’t late after that. " [br] What does Pamela Brand say is the social cause of lateness?
选项
A、Organization and planning skills are not taught.
B、Being on time is not emphasized in a community.
C、Some people are not raised ever wearing a watch.
D、The behavior of being late is often forgiven.
答案
B
解析
推理判断题。本题考查帕梅拉·布莱德认为迟到的社会原因是什么。定位句指出,从社会角度来看,迟到可能是习得的行为,或是受不注重守时的文化群体的影响,故答案为B)。A)“没有学习组织和计划的技能”,文章第五段第一句提到,迟到的生理原因是人的组织和计划能力处于低度开发阶段,但这是生理原因而非社会原因,故排除;C)“一些人在成长过程巾从不看手表”,文章第六段提到了手表,但这只是作者对社会原因列举出的例子之一,故排除;D)“迟到行为总是得到原谅”是心理原因,故排除。
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