[originaltext]M: Julie Ross is the author of Practical Parenting. She has been

M: Julie Ross is the author of Practical Parenting. She has been running parenting workshops for about 18 years now. Hey, Julie. Good morning.
W: Good morning.
M: So let’s go right into some of the things that parents used to do, corporal punishment for example, to try and discipline their kids, at least gain control. Firstly, you say that parents should not say "No" all the time. So let’s use an example here, my son is playing with the safety pin in the electric socket. I am probably gonna say, Jack, no, don’t do that. What’s a better way to go about it?
W: Well, I actually believe that "no" should be used in those occasions. It should be our word that can stop our children. But if they get desensitized to it, then when you say "no, don’t stick that into the socket", they are not gonna be able to listen to it.
M: So only on rare occasions when it’s absolutely important to use the word "no". What about the I-message? Give me an example of that.
W: I am a big believer in I-messages. And they sound like this. When you throw the ball in the house, I feel annoyed because it could break something. I would like you to play with something else instead. What we wanna do here is we want to make it about us in terms of setting the rules, as parents. We are supposed to be the leaders in the house. And now I-message does refer to "I am the parent, I am in charge, and I am comfortable being in charge".
M: Tell me how this next concept is. That is the "when and then" rule—the best example I can think of—your children are eating dinner but they wanna go out and play. OK, so, a lot of people will say, hey, if you eat all of the food on your plate, you can go out and play. What’s wrong with that?
W: Children hear the word "if" as a challenge, as a threat. And they will rise to that challenge. It’s like "Really? If...? OK, let’s just test that out". But the either-or, or the when-then choices, when you’ve done these order things. So that it’s a work first, play later. When you’ve done the meal, then you can go outside.
M: So they don’t hear the word "if" as encouragement. They see it as a challenge and they are gonna rebel against it.
W: You bet.
6. What is the conversation mainly about?
7. Who is Julie Ross?
8. According to the man, when should parents say "no" to their kids?
9. What does I-message refer to?
10. How do children see the word "if"?